Gracie's Mom Has Got it Goin' On...But I Need Your Help

It's on: I ran 7 miles yesterday in 66 minutes. At the gym, not outside, but still. my iPod got me through it, and honestly, by mile 6, I felt like I could keep going for a long time. So, here's my running song playlist so far. It's extremely random, and I'm gonna need more songs, so please send your suggestions.

1. Crash, the Primitives-great running song, and one of my favorites in general.
2. Fix You, Coldplay-not a fast song, but a really good one and one I find really inspirational
3. Sally Goodin', Chieftains-fast fiddlin'.
4. Holiday, Green Day-easy to get your feet going to this.
5. Breakdown, Jack Johnson-something about it, I love it, I always play it while I'm running.
6. You're Beautiful, James Blunt-I'm surprised that it works so well for my running pace (usually 6 mls/hour) but it does.
7. Cindy, Kentucky Thunder and Ricky Skaggs-See #3
8. Somebody Told Me, The Killers-fun to run to the synth-sounds.
9. I Wanna Be Sedated, The Ramones and The Offspring- nice, driving "running" beat.
10. Farm House, Phish-a "noodling" song. Again, surprising that I like running to it. But I do. My mind goes other places so I'm not focused on what my body is doing.
12. Bottle of Smoke, The Pogues-Don't know what the Hell he's saying, but it's good.
13. Snow (Hey Oh), Red Hot Chili Peppers-My favorite track from their new double album. Let me rephrase that: My favorite track that I've listened to so far, there's so many of them!
14. If I Can't Change Your Mind-Sugar-Recently discovered that this is a good one to get movin to.

So that's the current list. Please e-mail me your suggestions, or I'll be forced to buy the iPod playlist things.

Gotta run-

Built-In Best Friends

Kate has been my best friend for most of my life, but Daniel was my first best friend. He and I are under two years apart, like Grace and Johnny. Daniel and I were both born in Bloomington, Indiana, and even though I don’t really remember my first two years as a Hoosier, we’ve been told that we played for hours on the back porch making up words, games and ways to pass the time. There are some great pictures of the two of us in the earliest years, the years my kids are in now, but those photos are at my dad’s house, and I couldn’t get my hands on them in time for this blog post. We moved to Columbus, Ohio in 1974, and Daniel and I set up our playthings in that house on Tibet Road just the way we wanted them. We made elaborate Lego villages in the living room corner and played “Camper People” (AKA Fisher Price) nearby. We made up characters like “Go Go,” “June June,” and “Curly Cooper,” and we made up rules that we both agreed on and that only we understood.

Kate joined the Lightfoot family in June, 1975, but it wasn’t until 1976 or so that she tried to break into the well-established play world of her older brother and sister. When we moved to Boone, NC in 1980, Kate was five, I was eight and Daniel was ten. We were still playing Legos and Camper People, now in the fixed-up basement, and Kate was desperate to enter our circle. She was the baby, however, and didn’t play right—she didn’t know the rules. It was exasperating for Daniel and me. Daniel and I initially gave Kate three chances, three strikes, if you will, to get it right. After her chances were used up, we sent her back upstairs to help my mom bake carob-chip cookies or tofu spaghetti or whatever was up her sleeve that day. Kate always struck out within minutes. It went something like this: We would pretend Curly Cooper needed to go upstairs to take a bath. Kate wouldn’t use the doll house’s stairs, we pointed that out, and that was strike one. Then, there would be a house fire, but when Kate called 911, she’d forget to tell the operator the house’s address. Strike two. Or she would make the Lego people fly, or float, from point A to point B, rather than take a realistic number of steps. Strike three. Kate was banished, and Daniel and I were thrilled. Now I understand better why Kate has rejection issues and why she was a much better cook than I was at an earlier age.

Even when Daniel got more interested in playing with the neighborhood boys, and I spent more time being a nicer big sister, he and I still shared a bond (in good fun) over Kate’s shortcomings. We still do. It used to be we’d totally trip her up as to what day of the week it was and how many days of a vacation we’d have left, or quizzing her over how many cans of coke come in a six-pack. One of our favorites was to ask her what she liked about living in Bloomington, when, remember, we moved a year before she was born. Now, we find ourselves delighted when get an unflattering snapshot of Kate on the computer, so we can post it and all have a good laugh.

Kate and Daniel ganged up on me, occasionally—the most notable time being when they concocted “The Plan,” an elaborate scheme to get these sisters, who lived across the street from my grandmother, to play with me, a very shy, awkward girl at the time. Now they live only a mile or so apart, back in Boone, and they get to spend a lot more time together than I do with either of them.

We didn’t really become best friends until I left for college, but Kate has been my go-to-girl when I’ve needed any type of pep talk about my looks, my relationships, or my insecurities about, well, anything. She’s talked me through many “near panics” about finding our way to a party, what to take to the party, and what’s-going-to-happen-if-we’re-fifteen-minutes-late-to-the-party? She’s talked me through brunches, through the first Thanksgiving Dinner I hosted, and she’s always the last one to taste-test and approve any dish, if she’s around, before I serve it to my guests. Kate’s the one I want to rear my kids if something happened to David and me, and she’s the one who will tell me honestly if my butt looks too big in a pair of jeans. Kate and I were roommates, in Carrboro, for three years before I got married, and it was great to live with someone so familiar and so close to you that you could be cussing each other out one minute and sitting down to watch “Party of Five", all made up, the next.

We’ve had our fights, the three of us, that’s for sure. I remember the summer that my mom, grandmother, and Daniel picked Kate and me up from Camp Tekoa in the chevy van. It was hot, we were all tired and hungry and when we drove through the Mickey-Dees drive through, someone’s patience snapped and burgers went flying. I can’t recall if Daniel threw the burger at Kate or vice versa, but I do recall a soggy piece of pickle landing on my chin during the exchange. Then there was the time I got so mad at Kate, I threatened to shoot her with the B-B-gun, and the list goes on.

Now, we’re all three older, wiser, and by default, filling unexpected roles. Daniel reminds me that it’s not safe to talk on my cell phone while driving and that I should really avoid drinking diet sodas. Daniel took care of Kate during a major crisis about a year ago, and he offers to lend her money if she ever needs it. If I’m feeling really low, I always call Kate first, because nothing will ever be too bad for her to hear, and I don’t have to expend energy explaining myself or pretending like I feel well when I really don’t. When Daniel was moving to Durham and was looking for a place to live, I rode around with him, in August, 8 months pregnant, (me, not Daniel) weighing in on which apartments I thought were good and which weren’t.

We’ve all been hard on each other in the past, to each other’s faces and behind each other’s backs. One of the last things I promised my mom, as she lay there dying, is that we would all take care of each other. I think we have. I think we will.

Fifty (50) Things About Me

1. I stole this idea from someone else's blog.
2. I am going to run a marathon in November.
3. So is David.
4. David runs seven (7) miles almost every day.
5. I don't.
6. I ran track for two years in High School.
7. I was a sprinter, not a distance runner.
8. I played in the Band for four years in High School.
9. When I had to choose between track or band, I picked band.
10. I've been playing my flute ever since.
11. I played my flute in a wedding this past Saturday.
12. It's the fourth wedding I've played in.
13. I only recently started running again.
14. I like the challenge running a marathon poses.
15. I plan on raising money for the Leukemia and Lymphoma Society as I train for my marathon.
16. I will be asking you to sponsor me and my marathon.
17. Honk if you're reading this blog.
18. Running will be a good way to lose the stubborn baby weight.
19. The baby is almost three (3).
20. I could run fast as a child.
21. I used to do well in races in "Field Day" in Elementary School.
22. I did real well in the Jumprope Marathon at my school and at Junior Champ, at the County Level.
23. In the fourth (4th) grade, I was the Jumprope Marathon Champion (Watauga County's best) for my age group.
24. That was the proudest my dad has ever been of me. Ever.
25. I have some significant hormone imbalances.
26. It's taking a long time to get them back in check.
27. As part of the process, I agreed to send a blood sample to a lab to see if I have food allergies/senstivities.
28. I do.
29. Apparently, I'm allergic to a lot of the foods that I eat often.
30. I'm allergic to cow's milk and cheese and yogurt and walnuts.
31. I'm allergic to tuna, beef, pork and rabbit.
32. I am really bummed that I have to give up rabbit.
33. My illness/fatigue/depression have given me to permission to say no to people and things more easily.
34. My therapist says I didn't need an excuse like an illness to be able to do this.
35. Yes, I see a therapist.
36. I am the breadwinner and the primary caregiver in my family.
37. I relish both roles.
38. David may not agree with both statements in #36.
39. People at my kids' preschool have told me they thought David was a single dad.
40. David does the most (and the best) childcare of any dad I've witnessed since having kids.
41. I'm taking an on-line Magazine-Writing Class.
42. I took the same course five (5) years ago.
43. I think this time I'll be successful at getting an article published.
44. Sometimes I think I would like to have another child.
45. I don't think my body can currently have another child.
46. I need to get a hair cut.
47. I'm not sure how short to go this time.
48. Do you like Kelly Ripa's hair better longer or shorter (like it is now?)
49. We're driving to Owensboro, KY this Friday for a mini family reunion.
50. My grandfather and Johnny Depp's grandfather (and a third partner, Quisenberry) had an engineering business together years ago in O'Boro, KY.
51. It's called "Johnson, Depp, & Quisenberry"
52. My grandfather was the Johnson.
53. My grandmother and Johnny Depp's grandmother were sort of friends.
54. I met Johnny Depp's grandmother in the 1980's when Johnny Depp was in Twenty-One (21) Jump Street.
55. I wrote fifty-five (55) things about me instead of 50. Ok, fifty-four (54), #48 isn't about me.

How to Drop $63.00 at Durham Bulls Game and Still Not Be Sure You Had a Good Time

Ticket Total for Four Seats (Even though Grace sat in her seat for a total of 7 minutes, and 8 minutes on my lap; Johnny in his seat for two minutes and thirteen minutes of wiggling around, standing up, kicking the guy's seat in front, whining that he's hungry, thirsty, and really wants to the see "Bull"): $24

The evening's meal, consiting entirely of game food:A hot dog and small caffeine-free root beer for each of the kids, a burrito for me, and a beer for David. Two bags of Cracker Jacks for dessert. Total: $24
*note: Johnny ate half of his hot dog and none of his bun; Grace ate none of her hot dog or bun, but tipped over her root beer, sogging the bun so that no one wished to eat her wasted hot dog. Johnny threw half of his root beer away before I could stop him.

Second Beer for David: $5.00, while he enjoyed top-notch seats and a pretty good baseball game.
*note: After having been at the Ball Park for an entire hour before the game started, by the time the first pitch rolled around at 7:00 PM, Grace and Johnny had officially had enough of the "game" and lasted precisely fifteen minutes in the seats before I took them out for a little walk. The highlight for them: giving a high five to Wool E. Bull.

Two Ice-Cold, Freshly Squeezed Lemonades that I Swore I wouldn't Buy: $10.00
*note: After I took the kids to the playground area, Johnny relentlessly told me how thirsty he was. I spotted a water fountain and told him he could drink as much water as he wanted. Unfortunately, the water tasted like a lead pipe, so I couldn't half blame him for wanting something else. I was not about to buy two more small sodas for $2.25 each, when mere minutes before, Grace had spilled hers and Johnny only drank half of his. Nope, not going to do it. So, instead, I bought each of them a $5.00 lemonade. At least I could keep the cups to get some more mileage out of the money spent. The lemonades were delicious. I looked forward to topping off Grace's because I knew she wouldn't drink all of hers. Didn't have a chance, because after one sip, she dropped her cup and spilled the whole thing (and cracked the cup), so it was all a wash.

Total: $63.00

*note: A grandfather-aged man was admiring the kids. He said to me, "Are you going to keep them?" I said, "Yes, we decided we're going to keep them." He replied, "Well, they don't get any cuter, and they only get more expensive." So, there you go.

We Love You, Daddy!

Me: “Ok, kids, remember I told you that this was a special day for Daddy? A day to tell him how much you love him? Why don’t you go wish him a Happy Father’s Day? Who wants to go give Daddy a hug and a kiss and tell him Happy Father’s Day?”

Johnny: “Not me. I want juice. Give me juice. Give me JUICE!”

Me: “What’s the nice way to ask for some juice?”

Johnny: “Please. GIVE ME JUICE, PLEASE!”

Me: “Ok, why don’t you go pee-pee first and then we’ll go and get juice and cereal. Is Miss Grace up yet?

Grace: “I need gum.”

Me: “Grace, why don’t you go tell Daddy you love him.”

Grace: “Are you love me, Daddy? I need gum.”

David: “Wow, look who it is. My darling children, Grace and Johnny. Did everybody have a good sleep?”

Johnny: (drinking juice) “I wanna watch Wiggles, Mommy. Put Wiggles on. Wiggly Party.”

Me: “Did you give Daddy the picture you drew for him at school?”

Johnny: (running back with a picture he painted, beaming) “Look, Daddy! It’s for you!”

David: “Wow, Johnny, you did this? It’s great!”

Grace: “And me.”

David: “Yeah, Grace, you can draw good pictures, too.”

Johnny: “No, me. I did this picture, Gwace.”

Grace: (S-H-R-I-E-K-S at the top of her lungs).

Johnny: (crying loudly) “NO, Gwace!” (This prompts Grace to hit Johnny on the head, prompting Johnny to cry even harder). “WAAAA, Gwace hit me!”

Me: “No hitting, Grace. Hop down and go to your room. You can’t hit Johnny on the head.”

Grace: “I need gum.”

Whatever it Takes

I wasn't a hockey fan until, um, about a week ago, but wow, talk about an exciting time to get into the game. Really, it was pretty hard not to become a fan in "Caniac Country," here in the Triangle with Canes Stanley Cup coverage saturating the papers, the radios, the tvs, and the highways. I only watched two games during the finals, one being last night for the win, but my adrenaline pumped along just like it does during UNC basketball season. I even got goose bumps this morning, driving by the RBC Center in Raleigh, where it all went down last night, so I guess it's official: I'm a Canes fan and I will be buying a championship t-shirt. I'm mainly really happy for the players and the die-hard fans who have followed them ever since coming to NC. And I'm happy that the Triangle, make that the whole state, can unite in basking in this glory as opposed to the factious loyalties college sports breed. There's this guy, we'll call him "Bo," who comes by work twice a week to deliver checks from our accountants. Bo's a die-hard NC State fan, who absolutely depises Carolina (in the way that we despise Duke). Bo has had to put up with me gloating through the 2005 NCAA basketball season and title, last year's football and basketball wins against State, and now, out of the blue it seems, the UNC Baseball team being so hot. It just burns him up to see Carolina win. Finally, there's a team Bo and I can both rally behind. Way to go, Canes!!

A Tribute To My Daddy on My Blog

Oh, where do I begin to honor you, a force so hard to package in a box. It’s like the Stevie Nicks song Landslide says, I’ve been afraid of changing cause of you. Because we kids have built our lives round you. You taught us right from wrong and how to act. You taught us not to interrupt or lie. Our childhood was full of laughs and games. Those memories are with me still today. You loved your children more than life itself. We knew that then and we still know it now. We haven’t always seen things eye to eye. But it’s ok that we are not the same. A music buff, you’re way more hip than we. You made sure that we knew how bright you are. That you’d forget more knowledge than we’d learn. That Shakespeare is the greatest writer known. And those who disagree are none but fools. The New York trips we shared were special times. As well as playing music in the band. Now Grace and Johnny bring new life to you. Your gifts to me continue through that love. To make you proud is so much what I want. You make me proud so keep it up, the good. I love you Daddy and I always will.

PS Did you notice that this is written entirely in Iambic Pentameter...even the title??

It's the Little Things in Life...

Just a few funny/cute things that the kids have done or said:

Grace:

• Calling Lucky Charms, "Chucky Arms"
• When asked if she would like to move to Boone replying, "I'm not a Boone kid."
• Playing a song on the piano and making up lyrics about the Literacy Council
• Calling a movie theater a "movieator"
• Calling a microphone a microwave and a cucumber a hamburger
• Calling Grandpa George "Baby George" and Baby Reese "Mr. Reese"

Johnny:

• Saying, "Hi, I'm name Dinosaur Bones."
• Asking me to help him take off his princess dress so he can play with his tools, because you don't wear a dress when you play with tools. It ain't right.
• Telling me that I'm Cinderella and that he's a prince and that he loves me and wants to take me to a Ball and marry me.

True Friends

Yesterday I hosted a brunch for my four college suite-mates as Trish and her family are moving to the beach soon, and it was a good reason for us all to get together. It was the first time all five of us plus our kids were together, and, in fact, the first time in a long time all five of us gals were together. Sixteen years ago, in the fall of 1990, we all met on the 5th floor of Carmichael Dorm at UNC, after having been randomly placed in a suite (in Jen's case, the one across the hall) that we would call home for the next two years. We five became fast friends and each other's family, when we needed that kind of support the most. We relied on Anna's mac computer to type up writing assignments and her electric ham-n-cheese sandwich maker. We relied on Jen for a hug and an encouraging word when we were homesick, lovesick, or sick over that Astronomy test score. We relied on Trish for a good laugh, and we relied on Shannon and her parents when we needed to get away, to High Point, for a delicious home-cooked meal.

We used to nurse each other's hangovers and broken hearts, and now we nurse our own children. We used to compare biology and psychology notes, and now we compare notes on baby-sign language, kindergarten readiness and how to cook an easy casserole. We have stories, boy do we have stories. Some that are fun to remember and some we'd most definitely like to forget. Like the one about falling off the top bunk and rolling under the bottom bunk...and staying there for a long time, while everyone in the room laughed. Or bonging bicardi and it "hitting like a freight train." Or falling down the night of the basketball championship in 1993 and going to the ER for stitches. Or inviting a gaggle of Canadians to our 70's party ("You're on fire, kid!")...but enough about me.

This group has been together through five weddings, six births, four deaths and one divorce. We met during the formative years, the college, years, the best years of our lives, and we fantasized back then about having children around the same time so we could push them in strollers together. Yesterday that dream came true. The reality is we don't live close enough to push strollers together. We've made new friends to do that with through work, playgroups, hobbies, and church. For now, we'll have to settle for an annual beach reunion. Nothing will take away the history we five have with each other. Nothing. And when it comes down to it, we all know, at least I hope we all know, that we'll always have each other's backs.

Boy Crazy

Grace is positively, unequivocally, no-way-to-hide-it, boy crazy, bless her heart. It's the strangest thing to watch, because it's nothing David or I or her peers have influenced. This is 100% nature, no nurture about it. Some of the 4 and 5-year olds in Grace's preschool do dress like teenagers and look like they could be "boy crazy." Not Grace. She's the embodiment of pure, sweet, innocent, and generally unaware. Her first obsession was with "Beef," aka "Steve" from the kids' show Blue's Clues. She's moved on, but Steve occasionally still gives her butterflies. Then there was this show-off "Brandon" from a Kathie Lee video. He was the first one we called "Boy." He's a camera hog, who wears an irressistible leather jacket. That was before Juan Carlos. Juan Carlos is from Venezuela. He is twelve. He is handsome. He makes Grace go weak in the knees. It's the same with "Guitar Boy," aka "James" and also with the latest, as we discovered on Sunday, our friend Bob. As far as we can see, Grace's physiological reaction to these crushes is involuntary. Poor thing doesn't have a bit of a poker face. She couldn't hide it if she wanted to. Thing is, she doesn't know she should want to hide it. She literally shuts down when she's around these "boys," unable to talk, move, smile, or even blink. We're on to her now, but at first, it was as if she were suddenly getting sick. Love sick is more like it. It's hard not to egg it on, because it's so darn cute and funny to watch this sweet little girl absolutely lose her plot around the next thing in fatigue cargo pants, kicking a soccer ball, and/or strumming a guitar.

My Life as an iPod

Great News! My iPod came fully back to life! I think the spin cycle did it some good, because it sounds even better than it did before the full wash! To celebrate, I've posted "My Life as an iPod."

Here are the instructions and then my results after.
Put your music player on shuffle. Press forward for each question. Use the song title as the answer to the question. Post on your blog. Ok, I admit, I cheated a little. Some of them are random shuffles and some of them aren’t, but they are all songs on my iPod.

Will I get far in life?
Sitting, Waiting, Wishing, Jack Johnson

How do my friends see me?
Haunted, The Pogues and Sinead O’Connor

Where will I get married?
Farm House, Phish

What is my best friend's theme song?I
Wanna Be Sedated, The Ramones

What is the story of my life?
Crash, The Primitives

What was high school like?
Rock N Roll High School, The Ramones

How can I get ahead in life?
Smile Like You Mean It, The Killers

What is the best thing about me?
Terrible Vision, Rhett Miller

How is today going to be?
Tears and Rain, James Blunt

What is in store for this weekend?
40 Boys in 40 Nights, The Donnas

What song describes my parents?
A Man And A Woman, U2

My grandparents?
Down The Old Plank Road, Bela Fleck/Jeff White

How is my life going?
Dark As A Dungeon, Vince Gill

What song will they play at my funeral?
Supposed To Be, Jack Johnson

How does the world see me?
Superstar, Carpenters, Tommy Boy Soundtrack

Will I have a happy life?
I Do, Weezer

What do my friends really think of me?
The Irish Rover, The Pogues

Do people secretly lust after me?
Never Know, Jack Johnson

How can I make myself happy?
Brown Sugar, Rolling Stones

What should I do with my life?
Talk, Coldplay

Will I ever have children?
Gracie, Ben Folds

What is some good advice?
Love And Peace Or Else, U2

What is my signature dancing song?
I Bet You Look Good On The Dancefloor, Arctic Monkeys

What do I think my current theme song is?
Lost Cause, Beck

What does everyone else think my current theme song is?
Super Mario Brothers Theme, Mr. Bungle

What type of men/women do you like?
Tennesse Stud, Jeff White/The Chieftains

What did you think of this?
Mixed Emotions, Rolling Stones

Wall of Fame

I started a new hobby yesterday. I was in PTA Thrift Store (Chatham County) flipping through records to see if any caught my eye that my dad might like. He's gotten to the point where it's very difficult to give him gifts that he really wants or needs, but he likes records, and they're cheap, so I had a look. I pulled several for him and several for myself, either to put on CDs for my kids to listen to, or because I liked the cover. My new hobby is collecting album covers to display at home in what will be our Wall of Fame. If you catch the sales right, you can get three record-sized frames for $10 at A. C. Moore. I've already bought some and they're collecting dust in my closet. Depending on where you look, records at Thrift Stores and Fleamarkets are only about $1.00 (higher on E-Bay, of course). So, for roughly $4.00, one can create a piece of artwork for their home that looks cool, has heavy emotional and personal attachment to it, and that you can add to at your own pace. I can't wait to get my hands on my old records from the 70's and 80's to put up in my home. Three that I know are somewhere holed up in my dad's house are Abba's Greatest Hits, Free To Be You and Me, and the Soundtrack to the Muppet Movie. David's allowed to play too. I suspect he'll want to display anything from The Cure, Psychodelic Furs, or INXS. The rules I've come up with are: they have to be record covers from records we actually own or owned, or from music that we really listened to, either from our own collections, our parents' collections or our friends' collections OR if it's just too cool a cover to pass up, we can allow those too. Oh, and for $4.00 or less.

Compounded Interest

My grandmother had beautifully manicured nails. I never have. When I was ten years old, she told me that if I stopped biting my nails, she would give me $10. For the last twenty-four years I have been trying to earn the $10, without success. My grandmother died in 1994, but I haven't stopped trying. If I had earned my $10 back in 1982, and left it alone, and it earned a conservative .07% interest each year, I'd be $50.65 richer. And I'd have pretty nails.