Sometimes, You Just Gotta Ask

I was in the check-out line the other day at Weaver Street, buying gluten-free this and that, and the guy working the register is this Goth-looking kid with really black, long hair and really white skin. Nice guy, though, who I once bonded with as we both share a love of limeade. This day, though, he was chit-chatting with the guy in front of me, whose wife, apparently, had recently died. I didn't actually hear him say those words, but he was saying, "Yeah, she's been gone a month..." and "Coming here makes me think of her." The Goth-kid was visibly struck by the customer's news, and, as he continued to scan the groceries, said in an authentic, sombre, earnest tone, "Gosh, that's terrible. I am really sorry to hear that. That must be so hard."

"Yeah, I thought you should know, because you used to see us here together all the time and stuff. Yeah...well."

And I, standing behind listening to the whole thing, knew exactly how each of them felt: The customer, feeling the need to tell someone he encountered several times a week, someone who he's not close to, who wouldn't otherwise know, that his wife died. And the clerk who's used to commenting on people's limeade rather than how it must feel to lose the love of your life, and how awkward the whole exchange was.

But the juxtoposition that I just can't get out of my head, the juxtoposition between the extraordinary and the mundane, came when the Goth-clerk, fully aware of how trivial it sounded coming out of his mouth said, "I know this sounds kind of weird right now, but, do you want paper or plastic?"

Got Progesterone?

Let's settle this once and for all:

PMS: It is all in your head.

This is my PMS brain:

This is my PMS brain on progesterone:

Any questions?

Check it Out...

Wow, it's fall, and I feel alive. There's so much going on right now that it's hard to keep up. Here's a sampling of what's going on here in the Triangle that I'm involved in this fall, my second favorite time of year.

On sale now: Lucy's Cards. A unique fundraiser to support mental-health services for children and families in the Triangle. I share a facility here in Cary with the Lucy Daniels Center for Early Childhood, an award-winning therapuetic preschool that provides wonderful services to kids with emotional needs. The way the fundraiser works: You buy a Lucy's Card for $50. 100% of the $50 goes to programs that the Lucy Daniels Center offers. Then for one week, Nov. 3-10, 2006, you use your card to shop at over 200 stores in the Triangle (locally-owned stores, not chains) and you get a 20% discount on all the stuff you buy. So, if you spend $250 the week of Nov. 3-10, (think holiday shopping early, we all spend $250 during the holidays, right?) you recap your $50 and you've donated to a really important service for children. If you spend more than $250, that's pure savings to you. So, shop, save, and help kids. (But if you do buy a card, I encourage you to buy one from me...I'm running my own specials for those who sign up first)

Next week, Thursday, Oct. 12, 7:00, Chapel Hill Bible Church: Caramore Community's 2006 Annual Client Celebration, Featuring local author Lee Smith (There is no charge to attend this event!) Caramore, where my husband works, is a private, non-profit organization in Carrboro that provides comprehensive services for mentally ill adults. It's a highly successful community-based program whose model more people need to know about--especially in this day and age where there's lots of talk about mental health reform in NC. Lee Smith, a well-known local author, will speak first-hand about how Caramore helped her son.

Wednesday, Oct. 18-Friday, Oct. 20: Troika Music Festival, an event designed to promote and celebrate the independent music scene in the Durham, Chapel Hill, and Raleigh area. Here's a special shout-out to my friends in the band Vedere Rosso, who will be playing on Friday, Oct. 20, at 7:45 PM, at the MarVell Event Center.

Saturday, November 4, "Art as Healing & Healing as Art", 1:30-4:30, NC Bar Center in Cary, NC, $25: a lecture that my place of employment, the Lucy Daniels Foundation, is hosting. The Foundation is pleased to host two internationally known presenters for this inaugural lecture:Thomas Sayre, local artist & designer and Salman Akhtar, MD, psychiatrist & psychoanalyst, poet & writer. The artist and the psychoanalyst will combine the origins of art with the theories of potential space in the following talks:Wrestling with the Angel, Thomas Sayre, and Hearing Voices: Psychotic, Poetic, and Psychoanalytic, Salman Akhtar, MD.

(Both of these speakers are really, really, good- plus Thomas Sayre is one of Raleigh's own with artwork up a the the NCMA, RDU Aiport and Exploris. Plus he's in a rock band. Plus, there's a reception over at the Foundation afterwards. Y'all come out).

Then, of course, there's the Marathon, Half-Marathon on Nov. 12. at the Outer Banks. All I can say is wish me luck, lots and lots of luck.

Code Blue

Something strange happened this morning when I dropped Grace off at school. We were a couple of minutes late, and signed in after the 8:00 AM bell rung. Everything seemed business as usual in the office, but as we walked down the hallway to Ms. Diane's class, things got weird: the hall lights were off, the classroom lights were off, and no one else was walking the halls. Just as we began to enter Grace's class, the door slammed in our faces. I knocked and Ms. Diane hushed me inside, whispered, "Code Blue," and directed us over to a corner in the classroom where all the kids were "huddling." I crouched down, too, with Grace, and we "huddled," in the dark while Ms. Diane made sure all the room's blinds were shut. The preschool children, two teachers, another mother, and I sat quietly for about ten minutes, until the bell went off again, in a "Code Blue" drill which was activated in response to this.

Gluten-Free, Casein Free, Leaky Gut

Grace and I are now both on a Gluten-Free, Casein-Free diet. Gluten is a protein found primarily in wheat, but also in barley, rye and oats. Casein is a protein found in milk products. I've basically been on a Casein-Free diet since this past June when a blood test revealed that I had food sensitivities to 35 foods, many of them forms of cow's milk. I ran into an acquaintance twice this weekend, a mother whose older daugther exhibits behaviors and tendencies, like Grace, that are consistent with Autism Spectrum Disorder. This mother put her daughter on the GFCF diet with excellent results. I'd heard about the possible link between wheat, milk and autism, but since none of the authorities believe Grace has autism, I have never taken too seriously implementing a particular diet with her. Until now.

When people say they are allergic to foods, more often than not, they are talking about IgE food allergies--allergies that account for only 5% of adverse food reactions--allergies to foods that produce almost immediate symptoms like skin rashes and blocked airways. The other 95% of adverse food reactions are due to IgG antibodies, the kind that I have and that I believe Grace, and many children with autism and autism-like symptoms, have.

This past summer, when I was still complaining about headaches, fatigue, depression, brain fog, dizziness, etc. my healthcare practitioner suggested that I be tested for food allergies or food sensitivities. IgG food antibodies are linked with delayed symptoms, even as much as 48 hours after eating a certain food, therefore making it near impossible to pinpoint what foods, if any, are causing particular reactions. I got the blood test, got my lab results, and sure enough, IgG antibodies showed up in relation to 35 foods that I eat. The most interesting thing revealed, is that out of the 35, 23 foods are high in protein. Which brings me to "leaky gut" syndrome.

Over time, due to many factors such as stress, caffeine, too much ibuprofen, etc., the stomach lining in adults can deteriorate, causing small holes and extreme thinning of the lining. When this happens, whole, undigested protein molecules then pass directly from the stomach into the bloodstream. Once in the bloodstream, these large, un-broken-down proteins are seen by the body as foreign invaders and the body then creates antibodies to counteract them. This brings about food allergies and negative symptoms. I have fewer of these symptoms since I've been following the diet.

Take Grace. When given a choice of milk or juice, she always chooses milk. She eats lots of cereal, bread, pasta, and tortilla wraps--sometimes three and four in one sitting. Read the following taken from a website describing the possible effects of gluten and casein on a child's developing brain:

"The molecular structure of the partially undigested proteins in wheat and milk, known as peptides, resemble opiates. It is thought that such peptides have an effect much like opiates in the brain and nervous system. From this premise it follows that long term exposure to these opiate peptides can have many damaging effects on the developing brain and also affects behavior, just as any narcotic would."

So, in the mornings when I get so frustrated with Grace that she can't just put her pants on without her legs going all floppy, and when I tell her ten times nicely before raising my voice to "Come on and GET IN THE CAR!" it may be that she's not being obstinate but that her morning bowl of cheerios is doing her in?!